Message Board Madness

I started posting on 2 peas last night again, mildly, but still, a post is a post! it was done with some encouragement by friends (thank you :-* you know who you are!) and i'm glad to be back, even if its not "full time"... there are some people there i have really missed. I originally left because I wasnt able to handle the snark. It was ME that made the choice to leave, and its taken a lot of time and personal growth to feel I am at a point to be able to respond responsibly and to overlook the troublemakers. I'm going to step back in a toe at a time, and see how the water feels...

As of this afternoon, ironically, I was banned from Grumps... my main "home"... my source of friendships, and my favorite place to hang. I dont even know why i was banned. As far as I know, no one does. I'm not the only one who has been banned... but I think i'm the only "unexplained" one (i could be wrong about that as i'm not there to be able to know LMBO!). Its been a rollercoaster of emotions about it.

In short, I'm dealing. Its not my message board. The owner has the right to run it as she sees fit. Its her choice. I respect that right. But that doesnt mean I'm ok right now.

I can accept with grace, being off of that message board, mostly because it wasnt the BOARD that made it so special... it was the collection of women gathered there who I got to know and love and became so close to. It was the friendships, and the relationships that were built. Not the website, the name, or the prospect of being a part of a group.

Fortunately, relationships are not bound by web addresses, and most of the women who know me there have ways to contact me and keep in touch. I pray desperately that they do... I have so valued getting to know each and every one of them. I feel like they have each become small parts of my life individually as they shared in my joys and frustrations and i with them. I will miss sharing recipes, swapping photos of our kids, offering prayers and advice (and receiving them with so much comfort and joy knowing that i have real friends who honestly do care), and laughing the nights away with my famous late night grumps. Those days are over, but I pray the relationships are not. They are treasures worth keeping and fighting for... they are what matter.

I am sorry that it has come to this, and I do not know why. My heart is broken that I would be banned. I dont understand it. At all. I just have to trust that God can work good in this too, and that the joy shared with those involved over the past few months, will grow and stand strong through all this, to build even stronger friendships that can withstand the bounds of membership.